But, though the matter for panegyric were as fruitful as the topics of fatyr, yet would it not be hard to find out a sufficient reason, why the latter will be always better received, than the firft. For, this being bestowed only upon one, or a few perfons at a time, is fure to raise envy, and confequently ill words from the reft, who have no fhare in the bleffing: but fatyr, being levelled at all, is never refented for an offence by any, fince every individual person makes bold to understand it of others, and very wifely removes his particular part of the burden upon the shoulders of the world, which are broad enough, and able to bear it. To this purpose, I have sometimes reflected upon the difference between Athens and England, with respect to the point before us. In the Attic commonwealth, it was the privilege and birth-right of every citizen and poet to rail aloud, and in public, or to expofe upon the ftage, by name, any perfon they pleased, though of the greatest figure, whether a Creon, an Hyperbolus, an Alcibiades, or a Demofthenes: but, on the other fide, the leaft reflecting word let fall against the people in general, was immediately caught up, and revenged upon the authors, however confiderable for their quality or their merits. Whereas in England it is just the reverse of all this. Here, you may securely difplay your utmost rhetoric against mankind, in the face of the world; tell them, "That all are gone aftray; that there is none that doth good, no not one; that we live in the very dregs of time that knavery and atheism are epidemic as the pox; that honefty is fled with Aftræa;" with any other

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common places, equally new and eloquent, which are furnished by the * fplendida bilis. And when you have done, the whole audience, far from being offended, fhall return you thanks, as a deliverer of precious and useful truths. Nay farther; it is but to venture your lungs, and you may preach in Covent-Garden against foppery and fornication, and fomething else: against pride, and diffimulation, and bribery, at White-Hall: you may expose rapine and injustice in the inns of court chapel: and in a city pulpit, be as fierce as you please against avarice, hypocrify, and extortion. "Tis but a ball bandied to and fro, and every man carries a racket about him, to strike it from himself, among the reft of the company But, on the other fide, whoever should miftake the nature of things fo far, as to drop but a fingle hint in public, how such a one starved half the fleet, and half poisoned the rest: how such a one, from a true principle of love and honour, pays no debts but for wenches and play: how such a one has got a clap, and runs out of his eftate: how Paris, bribed by Juno and Venus, loth to offend either party, flept out the whole caufe on the bench: or, how fuch an orator makes long fpeeches in the fenate with much thought, little fense, and to no purpofe; whoever, I fay, fhould venture to be thus particular, must expect to be imprifoned for fcandalum magnatum; to have challenges fent him; to be fued for defamation; and to be brought before the bar of the house.

*Hor. Spleen.

But

But I forget that I am expatiating on a fubject,

having neither a talent On the other fide, I am

wherein I have no concern, nor an inclination for fatyr. fo intirely fatisfied with the whole present procedure of human things, that I have been fome years preparing materials towards A panegyric upon the world; to which I intended to add a fecond part, entitled, A modest defence of the proceedings of the rabble in all ages. Both these I had thoughts to publish, by way of appendix to the following treatife; but finding my common-place book fill much flower than I had reason to expect, I have chosen to defer them to another occafion. Befides, I have been unhappily prevented in that defign by a certain domeftic misfortune, in the particulars whereof, though it would be very seasonable, and much in the modern way, to inform the gentle reader, and would also be of great affiftance towards extending this preface into the fize now in vogue, which by rule ought to be large in proportion as the fubfequent volume is fmall; yet I shall now difmifs our impatient reader from any farther attendance at the porch; and, having duly prepared his mind by a preliminary difcourse, shall gladly introduce him to the fublime myfteries, that enfue.

A

TALE of a TUB.

SECT. I.

THE INTRODUCTION.

WH

HOEVER has an ambition to be heard in a croud, must prefs, and squeeze, and thrust, and climb, with indefatigable pains, till he has exalted himself to a certain degree of altitude above them. Now, in all affemblies, though you wedge them ever so close, we may obferve this peculiar property, that over their heads there is room enough, but how to reach it is the difficult point; it being as hard to get quit of number, as of hell;

evadere ad auras,

Hoc opus, hic labor eft.

To this end, the philofopher's way in all ages, has been by erecting certain edifices in the air: but, whatever practice and reputation these kind of ftructures have formerly poffeffed, or may still continue in, not excepting even that of Socrates, when he was fufpended in a basket to help contemplation; I think, with due fubmiffion, they seem to labour under two inconveniences. First, That the foundations being laid too high, they have been often.

But to return, and view the cheerful skies;

In this the talk and mighty labour lies.