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him. [ Aside.] [Seems to hesitate. ) Hark'ye, Charles, have you a mind for a laugh at Joseph ?
Char. I should like it of all things let's have it.
Sir Pet. Gad I'll tell him - I'll be even with Joseph for discovering me in the closet [Aside. ]
Hark'ye, Charles, be had a girl with him when I called,
Char. Who, Joseph! impossible!
Sir Pet. Yes, a little French milliner [takes him to the front] apd the best of the joke is, sbe is now in the room.
Char. The devil she is! Where?
behind the screen.
Both run up to the screen. The screen falls, at the same time Jo
Char. Sir Peter, this is the smartest little French milliner I ever saw. But
what is the meaning of all this? You seem 10 have been playing at hide and seek ") here, and for my part, I don't know who's in or who's out of the seMadam; will you please to explain?
Not a word: Brother, is it your pleasure to illustrate ?
Morality dumb too!
Well, though I can make nothing of it, I suppose you perfectly understand one another, good folks, and so Il
Brother, I am sorry you have given that worthy man so much cause for uneasiness Sir Peter, there's nothing in the world so noble as a man of sentiment Ha, ba, ha!
[Exit.] Jos. Sir Peter, notwithstanding appearances are against if
if you'll give me leave I'll explain every thing to your satisfaction.
Sir Pet. If you please, Sir.
Lady Teazle - knowing my pretensions
to your ward Maria
*) Hide and seek, ein Kinderspiel: Verstecken und Suchen.
- I say
of your temper
she called in here in order that she that I might explain what these pretensions were
And hearing you were coming and as I said before knowing the jealousy of your temper
went behind the screen and This is a full and clear account of the whole affair. Sir Pet. A
account truly! and I dare say the lady will vouch for the truth of every word of it.
L. Teaz. [Advancing] For not one syllable. Sir Peter.
Sir l'et. What the devil! don't you think wbile to agree in the lie?
L. Teaz. There's not one word of truth in what that gentleman has been saying.
Jos. Zounds, madam, you won't ruin me!..
L. Teaz. Stand out of the way, Mr. Hypocrite, r'll speak for myself. Sir Pet. Ay, ay
let her alone she'll make a better story of it than you did.
L. Teaz. I came here with no istention of listening to bis addresses to Maria, and even ignorant of his pretensions ; but seduced by his insidious arts, at least to listen to his addresses, if not to sacrifice bis honour, as well as my own, to his unwarrantable desires.
Sir Pet. Now I believe the truth is coming indeed.
L. Teaz. No, Sir, she has recovered her senses. Sir Peter, I cannot expect you'll eredit me; but the tenderness you expressed for me, when I am certain
did not know I was within, hearing, has penetrated so deep into my soul, has could I have eseaped the mortification of this discovery, my future life should have convinced you
my sincere repen. tance. As for that smooth-tongued hypocrire, who would have seduced she wife of his too credulous friend, while he pretended an honourable passion for his ward, I now view him in so despicable a light, that I shall never again respect myself for having listened to his addresses. [ Exit. )
Jos. Sir Peter Notwithstanding all this Heaven is
and so I'll leave you
Sir Pet. That you are a villain to your meditations
Jos. Nay, Sir Peter, you must not leave me The man who shuts his ears against conviction Sir Pet, Ob,
sentiments damn your sentiments,
[ Exit Joseph following.)
Joseph Surface's Apartment. M. Jos. Stanley! why should you think I would see Mr. Stanley! you know well enough he comes intreating for something.
Serv. They let him in before I knew of it; and old Rowley is with him,
Jos. 'Pshaw,' you blockhead; I am so distracted with my own misfortunes, I am not in a humour to speak to any one
but shew the fellow up. [ Exit Servant. ] Sure fortune never played a man of my policy such a trick before
diy character ruined with Sir Peter
my hopes of Maria lost I'm in a pretty humour to listen to poor relations truly. I shan't be able to bestow even a benevolent sentiment on old Stanley Oh, here he comes; l'll retire, and endeavour 10 put a little charity in my face however. [Exit.)
Enter Sir Oliver and Rowley. Sir. Oliv, What, does he avoid us? That, was him ), was it not ?
Rowl. Yes, Sir; but his nerves are too weak to bear the sight of a poor relation: I should have come first to break the matter to him. Sir Oliv. A plague of his nerves —
yet this is he whom Sir Peter extols as a man of a m benevolent way of thinking,
Rowi, Yes he has as much speculative benevolence as any man in the kingdom, though he is not so sensual as to indulge himself in the exercise of it.
Sir Oliv. Yet he has a string of sentiments, I suppose , at his Gingers ends.
*) That was him, in der gemeinen Sprechart statt: that was he you a moment
Rowl. And his favourite one is, That charity begins at home.
Sir Oliv. And his, I presume, is of that domestic sort, which never stirs abroad at all.
Rowl. Well, Sir, rll leave you to introduce yourself as old Stanley; I must be here again to announce you in your real character.
Sir Oliv. True and you'll afterwards meet me at Sir Peter's.
Rowl. Without losing a moment, (Exit Rowley.)
Sir Oliv. Here he comes I don't like the complaisance of his features.
Mr. Stanley, I presume.
Sir Oliv. Dear Sir, there's no accasion. [ Aside. ] Too ceremonious by half.
Jos, Though I have not the pleasure of your acquaintance, I am very glad to see you look so well. I think, Mr. Stanley, you was nearly, related to my mother,
Sir Oliv, I was, Sir; so nearly, that my present poverty. I fear, may do discredit to her wealthy children; else I would not presume to trouble you now.
Jos. Ah, Sir, don't mention that For the man who is in distress has ever a right to claim kindred with the wealthy; I am sure I wish I was of that number, or that it was in my power to afford you even a small relief,
Sir Oliv. If your uncle Sir Oliver was here, I should have a friend.
Jos. I wish he was, Sir, you sḥould not want an advocate with him, believe ine.
Sir Oliv. I should not need one, my distresses would recommend me. But I imagined bis bounty had enabled you to be the agent of his charities.
Jos. Ah, Sir, you are mistaken; avarice, avarice, Mr. Stanley, is the vice of age; to be sure it has been spread abroad that he has been very bountiful to me, but without the least foundation, though I never chose to contradict the report.
Sir Oliv. And has he never remitted you bullion *), rupees **), or pagodas ***)?
Jos, Oh, dear Sir, no such thing. I have indeed received some trifling presents from him, such as shawls, davits ****), and Indian crackers; nothing more, Sir.
Sir Oliv. There's gratitude for twelve thousand pounds! [ Aside. ] Shawls, avadavits, and Indian crackers !
Jos. Then there's my brother, Mr. Stanley; one would scarce believe what I have done for that unfortunate young man. Sir Olip: Not I for one.
[ Aside. ) Jos. Oh, the sums I have lent him! Well, 'twas an amiable weakness I must owo I can't defend it, tho' it appears more blameable at present, as it prevents me from serving you, Mr. Stanley, as my heart direcis.
Sir Oliv, . Dissembler [ Aside. ] - then you cannot assist me.
Jos. I am very unhappy to say it's not in my power at present; but you may depend upon hearing from me when I can be of any service to you.
Sir Oliv. Sweet Sir, you are too good.
Jos. Not at all, Sir; to pity without the power to relieve, is still more painful, than to ask and be denied. Indeed, Mr. Stanley, you have deeply affected me. most devoted; I wish you health and spirits.
Sir Oliv. Your ever grateful and perpetual [ bowing low] humble servant,
Jos. I am extremely sorry, Sir, for your misfortunes Here, open the door – Mr. Stanley, your most devoted. Sir Oliv. Your most obliged servant. Charles, you are
[ Aside, and exit. ] Jos. This is another of the evils that attend a man's haring so good a character It subjects him to the importunity of the necessitous the pure and sterling ore of charity is a very expensive article in the catalogue of a man's virtues ; whereas, the sentimental French plate I use, answers the purpose full as well, and pays no tax.
*) Ballion, Klumpen unbearbeiteten Goldes cder Silbers. **) Rupee, eine Indianische Münze (s. Theil I S. 467. ***) Pagod, gleichfalls eine Indianische Goldmünze, an Werth a Rthlr, 5 Gr. bis 2 Rthlr. 11 Gr. ***), Avadavits, vermuthlich der auch unter dem Namen Hirundo esculenta bekannte Indianische Vogel.