is a little talkative, yet every body allows she is the best natured sort of woman in the world.

Mar. Yes with the very gross affectation of good nashe does more mischief than the direct malice of old Crabtree.

ture,

Jos. Faith 'tis very true; and whenever I hear the current of abuse running hard against the characters of my best friends, I never think them in such danger as when Candour undertakes their defence.

you

L. Sneer. Hush! hush! here she is.

Enter Mrs. Candour.

Mrs. Cand. Oh! my dear Lady Sneerwell; well, how do do? Mr. Surface, your most obedient. news abroad? No! nothing good I suppose but scandal!

nothing but scandal!

Jos. Just so indeed, madam.

Mrs. Cand. Nothing but scandal!

you

Is there any -No! nothing

do do child; what, is every thing at an end between you and Charles? What, is he too extravagant?

talks of nothing else.

Ay! the town

Mar. I am sorry, madam, the town is so ill employed.

Mrs. Cand. Ay, so am I child

we can't stop people's tongues.

www

1

but what can one do? They hint too, that your

guardian and his lady don't live so agreeably together as they did. Mar. I am sure such reports are without foundation.

Mrs. Cand. Ay, so these things generally are: "Tis like Mrs. Fashion's affair with Colonel Coterie; though, indeed, that affair was never rightly cleared up; and it was but yesterday Miss Prim assured me, that Mr. and Mrs. Honeymoon are now become mere man and wife, like the rest of their acquaintance. She likewise hinted, that a certain widow in the next street had got rid of her dropsy, and recovered her shape in a most surprising manner.

Jos. The licence of invention, some people give them selves, is astonishing.

Mrs. Cand. 'Tis so but how will you stop people's tongues? "Twas but yesterday Mrs. Clacket informed me, that our old friend, Miss Prudely, was going to elope, and that her guardian caught her just stepping into the York Diligence with her dancing master. I was informed too, that Lord Flimsy caught his wife at a house of no extraordinary fame, and that Tom Saunter and Sir Harry Idle were to measure

1

swords on a similar occasion...

But I dare say there is no

truth in the story, and I would not circulate such a report

for the world.

Jos. You report *)! No, no, no.

Mrs. Cand. No,

the tale-makers.

no, tale-bearers are just as bad as

-

Enter Servant.

Serv. Sir Benjamin Backbite and Mr. Crabtree.

[Exit Servant.]

Enter Sir Benjamin and Crabtree.

Crab. Lady Sneerwell, your most obedient humble servant. Mrs. Candour, I believe you don't know my nephew Sir Benjamin Backbite; he has a very pretty, taste for poetry, and shall make á rebus **) or a charade with any one.

Sir Benj. Oh fie! uncle.

Crab. In faith he will: did you ever hear the lines he made at Lady's Ponto's route ***), on Mrs. Frizzle's feathers catching fire; and the rebuses his first is the name of a fish the next a great naval commander, and

-

Sir Benj. Uncle, now prythee.

L. Sneer. I wonder. Sir Benjamin, you never publish any thing.

Sir Benj. Why, to say the truth, 'tis very vulgar to print and as my little productions are chiefly satires, and lampoons on particular persons, I find they circulate better by giving copies in confidence to the friends of the parties; however, I have some love-elegies, which, when favoured by this lady's smiles [to Maria], I mean to give to the public.

Crab. 'Foregad, madam, they'll immortalize you, [to Maria] you will be handed down to posterity, like Petrarch's Laura ****), or Waller's Sacharissa †).

Sir Benj. Yes, madam, I think you'll like them [to Maria], when you shall see them on a beautiful quarto type, where a neat rivulet of text shall murmur through a meadow of mar'foregad they'll be the most elegant things of their kind. Crab. But, odso! Ladies, did you hear the news?

gin,

*) Ironisch zu verstehen. **) Rebus bedeutet das was Charade sagt. ***) Siehe eine Anmerkung im ersten Theil zu Seite ****) Laura, geboren zu Avignon 1308, die Geliebte des Dichters Petrarca, auf die er 318 Sonnette und 88 Canzonen verfertigte. t) S. Theil II, Seite 199.

193.

Mrs. Cand. What do you mean the report of
Crab. No, madam, that's not it Miss Nicely going to

be married to her own footman.

Mrs. Cand. Impossible!

Sir. Benj. 'Tis very true indeed, madam; every thing is fixed, and the wedding liveries bespoke.

Crab. Yes, and they do say there were very pressing reasons for it.

Mrs. Cand. I heard something of this before.

L. Sneer. Oh! it cannot be; and I wonder they'd repon such a thing of so prudent a lady.

Sir Benj. Oh! but, madam, that is the very reason that it was believed at once; for she has been so very cautious and reserved, that every body was sure there was some reason for it at bottom.

Mrs. Cand. It is true, there is a sort of puny, sickly reputation, that would outlive the robuster character of an hundred prudes.

Sir Benj. True, madam; there are Valetudinarians in reputation as well as constitution, who being conscious of their weak part, avoid the least breath of air, and supply their want of stamina by care and circumspection.

Mrs. Cand. I believe this may be some mistake: you know, Sir Benjamin, very trifling circumstances have often given rise to the most ingenious tales.

you

Crab. Very true; but odso! ladies, did hear of Miss Letitia Piper's losing her lover and her character at Scarborough)? Sir Benjamin you remember it.

Sir Benj. Oh, to be sure, the most whimsical circum

L. Sneer. Pray let us hear it.

Crab. Why, one evening, at Lady Spadille's assembly, the conversation happened to turn upon the difficulty of breeding Nova Scotia sheep in this country; no, says a lady present, I have seen an instance of it, for a cousin of mine, Miss Letitia Piper, had one that produced twins. What, what, says old lady Dundizzy, (whom we all know is as deaf as a post) has Miss Letitia Piper had twins This, you may easily ima gine, set the company in a loud laugh; and the next morning it was every where reported, and believed, that Miss Letitia

*) S. Theil I, S. 196.

Piper had actually been brought to bed of a fine boy and girl.

Omnes. Ha, ha, ha!

Crab. 'Tis true, upon my honour. Oh, Mr. Surface, how do yo do: I hear your uncle, Sir Oliver, is expected in town; sad news upon his arrival, to hear how your brother has gone on.

Jos. I hope no busy people have already prejudiced his uncle against him. hè may reform. Sir Benj. True, he may;

for my part,

him so utterly void of principle as people say

'I never thought

and tho' he has lost all his friends, I am told no body is better spoken of amongst the Jews.

Crab. Faregad, if the Old Jewry was a ward, Charles would be an Alderman, for he pays as many annuities as the Irish Tontine; and when he is sick, they have prayers for his recovery in all the Synagogues *).

Sir Benj. Yet no man lives in greater splendor.

They

tell me, when he entertains his friends, he can sit down tơ dinner with a dozen of his own securities **), have a score of tradesmen waiting in the antichamber, and an officer ***> behind every guest's chair.

Jos. This may be entertaining to you, gentlemen; but you pay very little regard to the feelings of a brother.

Mar. Their malice is intolerable. [Aside.] Lady Sneerwell, I must wish you a good morning; I'm not very well.

Mrs. Cand. She changes colour.

L. Sneer. Do, Mrs. Candour, follow her. Mrs. Cand. To be sure I will; poor dear girl, who knows what her situation may be. [Mrs. Candour follows her.}

*) Old Jewry, ein Theil von London, der, wenigstens sonst; stark von Juden bewohnt war; ward ist der Name, mit welchem die Quartiere oder Viertel der Stadt London bezeichnet werden. Alderman ist die Würde eines Vorstehers dieser Viertel. Annuity, eigentlich eine Leibrente; an dieser Stelle bezeichnet es die Summe, welche man jährlich für ein gelichenes Kapital zu geben sich anheischig macht. Da nun Charles vielen Juden auf diese Art jährlich Summen auszahlen muss, so wird von ihm scherzhaft_ gesagt, er müsse jährlich so viele annuities bezahlen, als die Leibrentengesellschaft in Irland. **) Securities sind hier Leute die für ihn gut gesagt haben. ***) Nach unserer Art zu reden: einen Landreuter (in Bedienten-Livree) hinter jedem Gast.

L. Sneer. 'Twas nothing, but that she could not bear to hear Charles reflected on, notwithstanding their difference. Sir. Benj. The young lady's penchant is obvious. Crab. Come, don't let this dishearten you follow her, and repeat some of your odes to her, and I'll assist you. Sir Benj. Mr. Surface, I did not come to hurt depend on't your brother is utterly undone. Crab. Oh! undone as ever man was guinea.

-

you,

but

can't raise a

Sir Benj. Every thing is sold, I am told, that was moveable.

Crab. Not a moveable left, except some old bottles, and some pictures, and they seem to be framed in the wainscot, 'egad..

Sir. Benj. I am sorry to hear also some bad stories of him.
Crab. Oh! he has done many mean things, that's certain.
Sir. Benj. But, however, he's
Crab. Ay! as he is brother
your

another opportunity.

your

brother.

we'll tell you morë

[Exeunt Crab,

L. Sneer. 'Tis very hard for them,

subject they have not quite run down.

and Sir Benj.]

indeed, to leave a

Jos. And I fancy their abuse was no more acceptable to your Ladyship than to Maria.

L. Sneer. I doubt her affections are further engaged than we imagine; but the family are to be here this afternoon, so you may as well dine where you are; we shall have an opportunity of observing her further; in the mean time, I'll go and plot mischief, and you shall study.

Sir. Pet.

SCENE II.

Sir Peter Teazle's House.

Enter Sir Peter Teazle.

[Exeunt.]

When an old batchelor marries a young wife,

what is he to expect? "Tis now above six months since my lady Teazle made me the happiest of men and I have been the most miserable dog *) ever since. We tiffed a little

*) Dog, ein Wort, das ungemein viele Bedeutungen hat, welche theils von der Miene des Redenden, theils von den da bei befindlichen Adjektiven abhängen. Herr Hüttner (in rei