ed it from the reprefentation fhe gave me of his." I have every thing in Tranquillus," fays fhe, " that I can wish for and enjoy in him (what indeed you told me were to be met with in a good hulband) the fondness of a lover, the tenderness of a parent, and the intimacy of a friend.”It tranfported me to fee her eyes fwimming in tears of afection when she spoke. “And is there not, dear fifter,” said I, "more pleafure in the poffeilion of such a man, than in all the little impertinences of bills, affemblies, and equipage, which it cot me fo much pains to make you contemn? She answered fmiling, "Tran quillus has made me a fincere convert in a few weeks, though I am afraid you could not have done it in your whole life. To tell you truly, I have only one fear hanging upon me, which is apt to give me trouble in the midit of all my fatisfactions: I am afraid, you must know, that I fhall not always make the fame amiable appearance in his eyes, that I do at present. You know, brother Bickerstaff, that you have the reputation of a conjurer, and if you have any one fecret in your art to make your fifter always beautiful, I should be happier than if I were mistress of all the worlds you have fhewn me in a starry night." "Jenny," faid I," without having recourfe to magic, I fhall give you one plain rule, that will not fail of making you always amiable to a man who has fo great a paffion for you, and is of fo equal and reasonable a temper as Tranquillus ;-Endeavour to pleafe, and you must please. Be always in the fame difpofition as you are when you ask for this fecret, and you make take my word, you will never want it; an inviolable fitelity, good-humour, and complacency of temper, outlive all the charms of a fine face, and make the decays of it invisible." Tatler.

me word the would come and dine with me, and therefore defired me to have no other company. I took care accordingly, and was not a little pleased to fee her enter the room with a decent and matron-like behaviour, which I thought very much became her. I faw the had a great deal to fay to me, and easily ducovered in her eyes, and the air of her countenance, that the had abundance of fatisfaction in her heart, which fhe loaged to communicate. However, I was refolved to let her break into her difcourfe her own way, and reduced her to a thousand little devices and intimations to bring me to the mention of her husband. But fading I was refolved not to name him, fhe begun of her own accord: "My hufband," lays the, "gives his humble fervice to you;" to which I only answered, "I hope he is well," and without waiting for a reply, fell into other fubjects. She at last was out of all patience, and fid, with a fmile and manner that I thought had more beauty and spirit than I had ever obferved before in her; "I did not think, brother, you had been fo ill-natured. You have feen ever fince I came in, that I had a mind to talk of my husband, and you will not be fo kind as to give me an occafion." "I did not know," aid I," but it might be a difagreeable fubject to you. You do not take me for fo old-fashioned a fellow as to think of entertaining a young lady with the difcourfe of her husband. I know nothing is more acceptable than to fpeak of one who is to be fo; but to speak of one who is fo-indeed, Jenny, I am a better bred man than you think me." She fhewed a little diflike to my raillery, and by her bridling up, I perceived the expected to be treated herefter not as Jenny Distaff, but Mrs. Tranquillus. I was very well pleafed with the change in her humour; and upon talking with her upon feveral fubjects, I could not but fancy that I faw a great deal of her husband's way and manner in her remarks, her phrafes, the tone of her voice, and the very air of her countenance. This gave me an unspeakable fatisfaction, not only because I had found her a husband from whom the could learn many things that were laudable, but also becaufe I look ed upon her imitation of him as an infallible fign that the entirely loved him. This is an observation that I never knew fail, though I do not remember that any other has made it. The natural flynefs of her fex hindered her from telling me the greatnefs of her own paffion, but I ea fily collect

§ 114. Curiofity.

The love of variety, or curiofity of feeing new things, which is the fame or at least a fiiter paffion to it,feems wove into the frame of every fon and daughter of Adam; we ufually fpeak of it as one of nature's levities, though planted within us for the folid purposes of carrying forward the mind to freth enquiry and knowledge: ftrip us of it, the mind (I fear) would doze for ever over the prefent page; and we should all of us reft at ease with fuch objects as prefented themfelves in the parish or province where we first drew breath.

It is to this fpur which is ever in our fides, that we owe the impatience of this defire for travelling: the paflion is no ways bad,--but as others are-in its mifmanagement or excefs;-order it rightly, the advantages are worth the purfuit; the chief of which are to learn the languages, the laws and customs, and underftand the government and intereft of other nations,to acquire an urbanity and confidence of behaviour, and fit the mind more cafily for converfation and difcourfe; to take us out of the company of our aunts and grandmothers, and from the tracks of nursery miflakes; and by fhewing us new objects, or old ones in new lights, to reform our judgments-by tafting perpetually the varieties of nature, to know what is goodby obferving the addrefs and arts of men, to conceive what is fincere,-and by feeing the difference of fo many various humours and manners-to look into ourselves, and form our own.

This is fome part of the cargo we might return with; but the impulfe of feeing new fights, augmented with that of getting clear from all leffons both of wisdom and reproof at home-carries our youth too early out, to turn this venture to much account; on the contrary, if the fcene paiuted of the prodigal in his travels, looks more like a copy than an original-will it not be well if fuch an adventurer, with fo unpromising a fetting-out, without cate, without compafs,-be not caft away for ever;—and may he not be faid to escape well-if he returns to his country only as naked as he first left it?

But you will fend an able pilot with your fon-a fcholar.-

If wildom could fpeak no other language but Greek or Latin-you do well-or if mathematics will make a gentleman, or natural philofophy but teach him to make a bow, he may be of fome fervice in introducing your fon into good focieties, and fupporting him in them when he has done but the upshop will be generally this, that in the most preffing occafions of addrefs, if he is a man of mere reading, the unhappy youth will have the tutor to carry, -and not the tutor to carry him.

But you will avoid this extreme; he fhall be escorted by one who knows the world, not merely from books-but from his own experience-a man who has been employed on fuch fervices, and thrice made the tour of Europe with fuccefs.

That is, without breaking his own, or

his pupil's neck; for if he is fuch as my eyes have feen! fome broken Swifs valetde-chambre-fome general undertaker, who will perform the journey in fo many months, "if God pe mit,"-much knowledge will not accrue;-fome profit at least,

he will learn the amount to a halfpenny, of every flage from Calais to Rome;-he will be carried to the beft inns,-instructed where there is the best wine, and fap a livre cheaper, than if the youth had been left to make the tour and bargain himself. Look at our governor! I befeech you:fee, he is an inch taller as he relates the advantages.

-And here endeth his pride-his knowledge, and his use.

But when your fon gets abroad, he will be taken out of his hand, by his fociety with men of rank and letters, with whom he will pafs the greatest part of his time.

Let me obferve, in the first place,-that company which is really good is very rare

and very thy: but you have furmounted this difficulty, and procured him the best letters of recommendation to the most eminent and respectable in every capital.

And I anfwer, that he will obtain all by them, which courtesy strictly stands obliged to pay on fuch occasions,—but no more.

There is nothing in which we are so much deceived, as in the advantages propofed from our connections and discourse with the literati, &c. in foreign parts; efpecially if the experiment is made before we are matured by years or ftudy.

Converfation is a traffick; and if you enter into it without fome ftock of knowledge, to balance the account perpetually betwixt you, the trade drops at once: and this is the reafon,--however it may be boafted to the contrary, why travellers have fo little (efpecially good) converfation with natives, owing to their fufpicion, or perhaps conviction, that there is nothing to be extracted from the converfation of young itinerants, worth the trouble of their bad language,or the interruption of their vifits.

The pain on thefe occafions is ufually reciprocal; the confequence of which is, that the difappointed youth feeks an eafier fociety; and as bad company is always ready, and ever laying in wait-the career is foon finifhed; and the poor prodigal returns the fame object of pity, with the prodigal in the gospel.

Sterne's Sermons.

of whift than with thofe of Bacchus, that talking fpoils company.

Every one endeavours to make himfelf as agreeable to fociety as he can; but it often happens, that thofe who molt aim at fhining in converfation, over-fhoot their mark. Though a man fucceeds, he fhould not (as is frequently the cafe) engrofs the whole talk to himleif; for that deftroys the very effence of converfation, which is talking together. We should try to keep up converfation like a ball bandied to and fro from one to the other, rather than feize it all to ourselves, and drive it before us like a foot-ball. We fhould likewife be cautious to adapt the matter of our difcourie to our company; and not talk Greek before ladies, or of the latt new furbelow to a meeting of country juttices.

But nothing throws a more ridiculous air over the whole converfation, than certain peculiarities, eafily acquired, but very difficultly conquered and difcarded. In order to display thefe abfurdities in a truer light, it is my prefent purpose to enumerate fuch of them, as are most commonly to be met with; and first to take notice of thofe buffoons in fociety, the Attitudinarians and Face-makers. Thefe accompany every word with a peculiar grimace or gefture: they affent with a fhrug, and conradict with a twisting of the neck: are angry with a wry mouth, and pleafed in a caper of a minuet-ftep. They inay be confidered as fpeaking harlequins; and their rules of eloquence are taken from the pofture-mafter. These should be condemned to converfe only in dumb-fhew with their own perfons in the looking-glafs; as well as the Smirkers and Smilers, who fo prettily fet off their faces, together with their words, by a je-ne-fçai-quoi between a grin and a dimple. With thefe we may likewife rank the affected tribe of Mimics, who are conftantly taking off the peculiar tone of voice or gefture of their acquaintance though they are fuch wretched imitators, that (like bad painters) they are frequently forced to write the name under the picture, before they can discover any likeness.

Next to thefe, whofe elocution is ab. forbed in action, and who converfe chiefly with their arms and legs, we may confider the profeffed Speakers. And firft, the emphatical; who squeeze, and prefs, and ram down every fyllable with exceffive vehemence and energy. Thefe orators are remarkable for their diftinct elocution and

force of expreffion: they dwell on the inportant particles of and ike, and the fignificant conjunctive and; which they feem to hawk up, with much difficulty, out of their own throats, and to cram them, with no lefs pain, into the ears of their auditors. Thefe fhould be fuffered only to fyringe (as it were) the ears of a deaf man, through an hearing-trumpet: though I must confefs, that I am equally offended with the Whisperers or Low Speakers, who feem to fancy all their acquaintance deaf, and come up fo close to you, that they may be said to measure nofes with you, and frequently overcome you with the full exhalations of a ftinking breath. I would have these oracular gentry obliged to talk at a diftance through a fpeaking-trumpet, or apply their lips to the walls of a whispering gallery. The Wits, who will not condeicend to utter any thing but a bon mot, and the Whitlers or Tune-hummers, who never articulate at all, may be joined very agreeably together in concert; and to thofe tinkling cymbals I would alfo add the founding brafs, the Bawler, who enquires after your health with the bellowing of a towncrier.

The Tatlers, whofe pliable pipes are admirably adapted to the "foft parts of converfation," and fweetly "prattling out of fashion," make very pretty mufic from a beautiful face and a female tongue; but from a rough manly voice and coarfe features, mere nonfente is as harsh and diffonant as a jig from a hurdy-gurdy. The Swearers I have spoken of in a former pa per; but the Half-fwearers, who split, and mince, and fritter their oaths into gad's bud, ad's fifh, and demme; the Gothic humbuggers, and thofe who "nick-name God's creatures," and call a man a cabbage, a crab, a queer cub, an odd fish, and an unaccountable mufkin, fhould never come into company without an interpreter. But I will not tire my reader's patience by pointing out all the pefts of converfation: nor dwell particularly on the Senfibles, who pronounce dogmatically on the moft trivial points, and peak in fentences; the Wonderers, who are always wondering what o'clock it is, or wondering whether it will rain or no, or wondering when the moon changes, the Phrafeologifts, who explain a thing by all that, or enter into particulars with this and that and t'other; and lafly, the Silent Men, who seem afraid of opening their mouths, left they should catch cold, and literally obferve the pre

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