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A full and true Account of the BATTLE

WE

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HOEVER examines, with due circumfpection, into the annual records of time, will find it remarked, that War is the child of Pride,

and

*The Battle of the Books took its rife from a controverfy between Sir William Temple and Mr Wotton; a controverfy which made much noife, and employed many pens towards the latter end of the last century. This humourous treatife is drawn up in an heroic comic ftyle, in which Swift, with great wit and fpirit, gives the victory to the former. The general plan is excellent, but particular parts are defective. The frequent chafms puzzle and interrupt the narrative: They neither convey any latent ideas; nor point out any diftinct or occult farcafms. Some characters are barely touched upon, which might have been extended; others are enlarged, which might have been contracted. The name of Horace is inferted; and Virgil is introduced only for an opportunity of comparing his tranflator Dryden, to the lady in a lobfier; to a mouse under a canopy of fiate; and to a fhrivelled beau within the pent-house of a full-boitomed periwig. Thefe fimilies carry the true ftamp of ridicule. But rancour must be very prevalent in the heart of an author, who could overlook the merits of Dryden; many of whofe dedications and prefaces are as fine compofitions, and as just pieces of criticism, as any in our language. The tranflation of Virgil was a work of haste and indigence. Dryden was equal to the undertaking, but unfortunate during the conduct of it. The two chief heroes among the modern generals, are Wotton and Bentley. Their figures are displayed in the most disadvantageous attitudes. The former is defcribed, "full of spleen, " dulnefs, and ill manners." The latter is reprefented, "tall,

"without

and Pride the daughter of Riches *. The former of which affertions may be foon granted; but one cannot fo eafily fubfcribe to the latter. For Pride is nearly related to Beggary and Want, either by father or mother, and fometimes by both: And, to speak naturally, it very seldom happens among men to fall out, when all have enough; invafions ufually travelling from North to South, that is to fay, from Poverty to Plenty. The most ancient and natural grounds of quarrels are Luft and Avarice; which, though we may allow to be brethren or collateral branches of Pride, are certainly the iffues of Want. For, to fpeak in the phrafe of writers upon politics, we may obferve in the republic of Dogs, which in its original feems to be an inftitution of the many, that the whole ftate is ever in the profoundest peace after a full meal; and that civil broils arise among them, when it happens for one great bone to be feized on by fome leading dog; who either divides it among the few, and then it falls to an oligarchy:

"without shape or comelinefs; large, without ftrength or pro"portion."--The battle, which is maintained by the Ancients with great fuperiority of strength, though not of numbers, ends with the demolition of Bentley, and his friend Wotton, by the lance of the Honourable Charles Boyle, youngest fon of Roger the fecond Earl of Orrery, and father of the prefent Earl. He was a fellow of the royal fociety, and invented the astronomical machine called the Orrery. Orrery.

* Riches produceth pride; pride is war's ground, &c. Vid. Ephem. de Mary Clarke; opt. edit.-now called Wing's feet almanack, and printed by J. Roberts for the company of Station

ers.

oligarchy; or keeps it to himself, and then it runs up to a tyranny. The fame reafoning alfo holds place among them, in thofe diffenfions we behold upon a turgefcency in any of the females. For, the right of poffeffion lying in common, (it being impoffible to establish a property in fo delicate a cafe), jealoufies and fufpicions do so abound, that the whole commonwealth of that ftreet is reduced to a manifest state of war, of every citizen against every citizen; till fome one of more courage, conduct, or fortune, than the reft, feizes and enjoys the prize: Upon which naturally arifes plenty of heart-burning, and envy and fnarling against the happy dog. Again, if we look upon any of these republics engaged in a foreign war, either of invafion or defence, we fhall find, the fame reafoning will ferve as to the grounds and occafions of each; and that Poverty or Want, in fome degree or other, (whether real, or in opinion, which makes no alteration in the cafe), has a great fhare, as well as Pride, on the part of the aggreffor.

Now, whoever will pleafe to take this scheme, and either reduce or adapt it to an intellectual ftate, or commonwealth of learning, will foon discover the first ground of disagreement between the two great parties at this time in arms; and may form juft conclufions upon the merits of either cause. But the iffue or events of this war are not so easy to conjecture at: For the prefent quarrel is fo inflamed by the warm heads of either

faction,

faction, and the pretenfions fomewhere or other fo exorbitant, as not to admit the least overtures of accommodation. This quarrel firft began, as I have heard it affirmed by an old dweller in the neighbourhood, about a small spot of ground, lying and being upon one of the two tops of the hill Parnaffus; the highest and largest of which had, it seems, been, time out of mind, in quiet poffeffion of certain tenants called the Ancients ; and the other was held by the Moderns. But thefe difliking their present station, sent certain ambaffadors to the Ancients, complaining of a great nuifance; how the height of that part of Parnaffus quite fpoiled the prospect of theirs, efpecially towards the eaft: And therefore, to avoid a war, offered them the choice of this alternative, Either that the Ancients would please to remove themselves and their effects down to the lower fummity, which the Moderns would gracioufly furrender to them, and advance in their place; or else that the said Ancients will give leave to the Moderns, to come with fhovels and mattocks, and level the faid hill as low as they fhall think it convenient. To which the Ancients made anfwer, How little they expected fuch a meffage as this, from a colony whom they had admitted, out of their own free grace, to fo near a neighbourhood: That as to their own feat, they were Aborigines of it; and therefore, to talk with them of a removal or furrender, was a language they did not understand : That if the height of the hill

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