"make you as happy as a Queen; you fhall "have fome in perfection: For when I was "chaplain to the Earl of Berkeley, who was in "the government here, I was fo poor, I was "obliged to keep a coffee-houfe, and all the no"bility reforted to it to talk treafon." The Dean then fet about making the coffee: But the fire fcorching his hand, he called to Mrs Pilkington to reach him his glove; and changing the coffeepot to his left hand, held out his right one, ordering her to put the glove on it; which accordingly the did; when taking up part of his gown to fan himself with, and acting in character of a prudifh lady, he faid, "Well, I don't know "what to think: Women may be honest that do "fuch things; but, for my part, I never could "bear to touch any man's flefh-except my "husband's; whom, perhaps," (faid he), “fhe "wifhed at the devil."

"Mr Pilkington," said he, " you would not "tell me your wife's faults; but I have found "her out to be d-n'd, infolent, proud, un"mannerly flut." "What has fhe done now ?" faid Mr Pilkington. "Done," faid the Dean; "why nothing, but fat there quietly, and never "once offered to interrupt me in making the "coffee; whereas, a lady of modern good breed"ing would have ftruggled with me for the cof"fee-pot, till fhe had made me fcald myself and "her, and make me throw the coffee in the "fire, or perhaps at her head, rather than per"mit me to take fo much trouble for her."

Mrs Pilkington ftaid at home with the Dean during the time of the afternoon's fervice; and he made her read his hiftory of the four last years of Q. Anne, afking her at the conclufion of every period, whether the understood it ? " for I "would," faid he, "have it intelligible to the "meaneft capacity; and if you comprehend it, "'tis poflible every body may."

She accompanied the Dean to evening prayer; and on their return to the deanry, he told Mr and Mrs Pilkington, that he gave them leave to ftay to fupper; which from him was a fufficient invitation. The Dean then decanted a bottle of wine; and the last glafs being muddy, he called to Mr Pilkington to drink it; "for," says he, “ I "C always keep fome poor parfon to drink the foul "wine for me." Mr Pilkington entering into his humour, thanked him, and told him, he did not know the difference, but was glad to get a glafs at any rate. "Why then," said the Dean, you fhan't; for I'll drink it myself. Why p-x take you, you are wiser than a paltry cu"" rate, whom I asked to dine with me a few days ago; for upon my making the fame fpeech to "him, he told me he did not understand fuch ufage; and fo walked off without his dinner.

By the fame token, I told the gentleman "who recommended him to me, that the fellow (6 was a blockhead, and I had done with him." The Dean then mifling his golden bottle-fcrew, told Mrs Pilkington very fiernly, he was fure fhe VOL. J.

P

had

had ftolen it. She affirmed very seriously, the had not. Upon which he looked for it, and found it where he himfelf had laid it: ""Tis "well for you," faid he, " that I have got it, "or I would have charged you with theft." "Why, pray, Sir," faid fhe, "fhould I be fufpected more than any other person in the "company?" "For a very good reafon," faid he, becaufe you are the pooreft."

At their going away, the Dean handed Mrs Tilkington down all the fteps to the coach, thanking them for the honour of their company, at the fame time flipping into her hand as much money as Mr Pilkington and she had given at the offering in the morning, and coach hire alfo ; which the durft not refufe, left fhe fhould have been deemed as great a blockhead as the parfon who refused the thick wine.

In one of the Dean's periodical fits of deafness, he fent for Mrs Pilkington; who having come, he brought out to her a large book, finely bound in Turkey leather, and handfomely gilt: "This," faid he," is a tranflation of the epiftles of Ho66 race, a prefent to me from the author; 'tis a "fpecial good cover; but I have a mind there "fhould be fomething valuable within fide of it." So taking out his penknife, he cut out all the leaves close to the inner margin. "Now," faid he, "I will give these what they greatly want;" and put them all into the fire. "Your task, Madam, is

to paste in these letters, in this cover, in the or"der I fhall give them to you: I intended to do

"it

"it myself, but that I thought it might be a pret

ty amusement for a child; fo I sent for you." She told him she was extremely proud to be honoured with his commands; but requested to have leave to read the letters as he went on. "Why," faid the Dean, " provided you will ac"knowledge yourself amply rewarded for your "trouble, I don't much care if I indulge you fo "far."

In reading the letters, fhe could not avoid remarking to the Dean, that, notwithstanding the friendship Mr Pope profeffed for Mr Gay, he could not forbear a great many fatirical, or, if she might be allowed to fay fo, envious remarks on the fuccefs of the Beggar's Opera. The Dean very frankly owned, he did not think Mr Pope was fo candid to the merit of other writers as he ought to be. She then ventured to ask the Dean, whether he thought the lines Mr Pope addreffes him with in the beginning of the Dunciad, were any compliment to him, viz.

O thou! whatever title please thine ear.

"I believe," faid he, "they were meant as "fuch, but they are very ftiff." "Indeed, Sir," faid fhe, “he is so perfectly a mafter of harmo"nious numbers, that, had his heart been the "leaft affected with his fubject, he must have. "writ better. How cold, how forced, are his "lines to you, compared with your's to him! Hail, happy Pope! whose gen'rous mind,* &c.

P 2

"Here

See vol. ix.

"Here we fee the masterly poet, and the warm, "fincere, generous friend; while he, according "to the character he gives of Mr Addifon, "damns with faint praise."—" Well,” replied the Dean, "I'll fhew you a letter of his." He did fo; and Mrs Pilkington was furprised to find it filled with low and ungentleman-like reflections, both on Mr Gay, and the two noble perfons who honoured him with their patronage after his difappointment at court. "Well, Madam," faid the Dean, "what do you think of that letter?” (fecing the had gone quite through it.) "In"deed, Sir," replied the, "I am forry I have "read it; for it gives me reafon to think there "is no fuch thing as a fincere friend to be met "with in the world.". "Why," replied he, "authors are as jealous of their prerogative as

kings; and can no more bear a rival in the "empire of wit, than a monarch could in his "dominions." Mrs Pilkington then obferving a Latin fentence writ in Italics, defired the Dean to explain it. "No," replied he, fmiling, "I'll "leave that for your husband to do. I'll fend "for him to dine with us, and in the mean time "we'll go and take a walk in Naboth's vineyard." "Where may that be, pray, Sir?" faid fhe. "Why, a garden," faid the Dean, "I cheated "one of my neighbours out of." When they entered the garden, or rather the field, which was fquare, and inclofed with a ftone wall, the Dean asked her how fhe liked it?" Why, pray,