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ODOHERTY. 3 These events will furnish fine materials for a new hour's Tete-a-tete with the

public.

EDITOR.

What a world of things will have happened ere 1825!

You will be knocked up ere then. You talk about your stomach-only see e how little remains in the bottle!

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

side me.

I had finished two ere you came in. I can never write without a bottle be

Judge Blackstone followed the same plan, he had always a bottle of port by him while he was at his commentaries. When Addison was composing his Essay on the Evidences, he used to walk up and down the long room in Holland-house-there was a table with the black strap at each end, and he always turned up his little finger twice ere he had polished a sentence to his mind. I believe he took brandy while he was doing the last act of Cato. There is no good writing without one glass.

“ Nemo bene potest scribere jejunus."

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

I prefer smoking, on the whole. But I have no objection to a glass of punch along with it. It clears our mouth. "Experto crede Roberto."

. | ODOHERTY, I am glad to see you have dropt your cursed humbug articles on German Plays. i hate all that trash. Is Kempferhausen defunct ?

I had a present of two aums of Johannisberg from him not a week ago. The piperly fellow once promised me a few dozens; but hertook it amiss that I peppered him so at the Tent.

I am sure you would have sold it to Ambrose if you had got it,--Will you have some supper ? Excuse me, I never eat supper.

EDITOR. (Rings.). Waiter, welsh rabbits for five, scolloped oysters for ten, six quarts of porter, and covers for two

It is all ready, sir ; Mr Ambrose knew what you would want the moment the Captain came in.

I am thinking seriously of writing some book. What shape do you recommend? I was thinking of a quarto.

A duodecimo you mean ; will a quarto go into a sabretache, or a work-basket, or a ridicule? Are you the bishop of Winchester ?

What bookseller do you recommend? [These are prime powldoodies !] Ebony to be sure, if he will give the best price. But be sure you don't abuse his good ternper. There was a worthy young man done up only a few months ago by the Cockney poets.

He gave £100 to one for a bundle of verses, (I forget the title,) of which just 30 copies were sold. They were all at him like leeches, and he was soon sucked to the bone. You must not tip Ebony any shabby trash-you must be upon honour, Mr Odoherty. You have a great name, and you must support it. If you mind your hits, you may rise as high as anybody I know in any of the slang lines.

WAITER.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

You flatter me! Butter !

EDITOR

Not one lick! Egan is not worthy of holding the candle to your Boxiana ; and yet Egan is a prime swell. You should get little Cruikshanks to draw the vignettes; your life would sell as well as Hogg's, or Haggart's, or any body else, that I remember.

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EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

A good one you inean?

ODOHERTY. No, —, Í scorn to flatter you, or any man. I shall tell the truth, all thie truth, and nothing but the truth. Do you expect me to say that you are a handsome man? Or that you have slim ancles? Or that you don't squint? Or that you understand the whole doctrine of quadrille? Or that you are the author of Waverley? Or the author of Anastasius ? Are these the bams you expect ?

Say that I am the author of the Chaldee, and I am satisfied.

No, I'll stick to my own rule. I'll claim it myself. I'll challenge Hogg if he disputes the point.

I hope you'll shoot potatoes ; for I could not afford to lose either of you ! you are both of you rum ones to look at, but devils to go.

ODOHERTY I intend to be modest as 'to my amours. You had better not. The ladies won't buy if you do so. Your amour with Mrs Macwhirter raised my sale considerably.

This is a very delicate age. I fear nothing at all high would go down with it.

ÉDITOR. Why there's a vast deal of cant afloat as to this matter ; people don't know what they are speaking about. Shew me any production of genius, written in our time, which does not contain what they pretend to abhor.

Why, there's the Edinburgh Review-you must at least allow 'tis a decent work.

EDITOR:

ODOHERTY.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

1

ODOHERTY.

Have you

forgotten Sidney Smith’s article about missionaries ?- I won't repeat the names of some of them.

ODOHERTY. The Quarterly?

EDITOR. Why, Gifford and I are old boys, and past our dancing days; but I believe you will find some very sly touches here and there. Byron

EDITOR. Poh! you're wild now. We may despise the cánt about him, but you must confess that there's always a little of what's wrong in the best of his works. Even the Corsair seems to have flirted a bit now and then. And Juân, you know, is a perfect Richelieu.

ODOHERTY.
Have you any thing to say against the Waverley novels ?

Not much. Yet even old Dame Norna in the Pirate seems to have danced in her youth. I strongly suspect her son was a mere filius carnalis.

What of Kenilworth, then?

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

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ODOHERTY.

'Tis all full of going about the bush. One always sees what Elizabeth is thinking about. She has never some handsome fellow or other out of her mind. And then the scene where Leicester and Amy get up is certainly rather richly coloured. There is nothing a whit worse in the Sorrows of Werter, or Julia de Roubigné, or any of that sentimental set.

Milman is a very well-behaved boy-You can say nothing of that sort against him.

EDITOR. He is a very respectable man, and a clergyman to boot'; but the bridal songs in his Fall of Jerusalem are not much behind what a layınan might have done. There are some very luxurious hits in that part of the performance. Did you attend old P-'s sale when you were in town?

No, I can't say I did; but I hear there was a fine collection of the Facetiæ, and other forbidden fruits. A friend of mine got the editio princeps of Poggio, but he sweated for it. The Whigs bid high. They worked to keep all those tid-bits for themselves.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

Does this affair of Lord Byron's Mystery create any sensation in London ?

Very little. The Parsons about Murray's shop are not the most untractable people in the world, otherwise they would never have abstained so long from attacking Juan, Beppo, and the rest of Byron's improprieties-they that are so foul-mouthed against Shelly; and such insignificant blasphemers as that Cockney crew.

EDITOR.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

I have often wondered at the face they shew in that omission.

ODOHERTY Really? No doubt a Bookseller must have something to say as to his own Review. But the thing should not be pushed too far, else a noodle can see through it. Meaning me?

EDITOR. Not at all. But as to Cain, I entirely differ from the Chancellor. I think, if Cain be prosecuted, it will be a great shame. The humbug of the age

will then have achieved its most visible triumph.

ODOHERTY.
I never saw it, but I thought it had been blasphemous.

No, sir, I can't see that. The Society might have had some pretence had they fallen on Don Juan ; but I suppose those well-fed Archdeacons, and so forth, have their own ways of observing certain matters.

Have you seen Lord Byron's letter on the subject to Mr Murray ? Yes; 'tis in the papers. A bite! that's the prose edition. It was written originally in verse, but Murray's friends thought it would have more effect if translated into prose; and a young clergyman, who writes in the Quarterly, turned the thing very neatly, considering. I belleve I have a copy of Lord Byron's own letter in my pocket.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

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BYRON TO MURRAY.*
Attacks on me were what I look'd for, Murray,

But why the devil do they badger you?
These godly newspapers seem hot as curry,

But don't, dear Publisher, be in a stew.
They'll be so glad to see you in a flurry-

I mean those canting Quacks of your Review-
They fain would have you all to their own Set ;-

But never mind them-we're not parted yet.
They surely don't suspect you, Mr John,

Of being more than accoucheur to Cain;
What mortal ever said you wrote the Don?

I dig the mine-you only fire the train !
But here--why, really, no great lengths I've gone-

Big wigs and buzz were always my disdain-
But my poor shoulders why throw all the guilt on ?

There's as much blasphemy, or more, in Milton.
The thing's a drama, not a sermon-book ;

Here stands the murderer-that's the old one there-
In gown and cassock how would Satan look?

Should Fratricides discourse like Doctor Blair?
The puritanic Milton freedom took,

Which now-a-days would make a Bishop stare ;
But not to shock the feelings of the age,
I only bring your angels on the stage.

* Letter from Lord Byron to Mr Murray. DEAR SIR,

Pisa, Feb. 8, 1822. Attacks upon me were to be expected; but I perceive one upon you in the papers, which, I confess, that I did not expect. How, or in what manner you can be considered responsible for what I publish, I am at a loss to conceive. If « Cain” be “ blas. phemous," Paradise Lost is blasphemous; and the very words of the Oxford Gentle man, “Evil be thou my good," are from that very poem, from the mouth of Satan : and is there any thing more in that of Lucifer in the Mystery ? Cain is nothing more than a drama, not a piece of argument. If Lucifer and Cain speak as the first murderer and the first rebel may be supposed to speak, surely all the rest of the personages talk also according to their characters; and the stronger passions have ever been per: mitted to the drama. I have even avoided introducing the Deity, as in Scripture

, (though Milton does, and not very wisely either ;) but have adopted his angel, as sent to Cain, instead, on purpose to avoid shocking any feelings on the subject, by falling short of, what all uninspired men must fall short in, viz. giving an adequate notion of the effect of the presence of Jehovah. The old mysteries introduced him liberally enough, and all this is avoided in the new one. The attempt to bully you, because they think it will not succeed with '

me, 'seems to me as atrocious an attempt as ever disgraced the times. What! when Gibbon's, Hume's, Priestley's, and Drummond's publishers have been allowed to rest in peace for seventy years, are you to be singled out for a work of fiction, not of history or argtment? There must be something at the bottom of this—some private enemiy of your own-it is otherwise incredible.

I can only say, “ Meme adsum qui feci,” that any proceedings directed against you, I beg may be transferred to me, who am willing and nught to endure them all; that if you have lost money by the publication, I will refund any, or all of the cops: right; that I desire you will say, that both you and Mr Gifford remonstrated against the publication, as also Mr Hobhouse ; that I alone occasioned it, and I alone am the person who either legally or otherwise should bear the burthen. If they prosecute

, 1 will come to England; that is, if by meeting it in my own person, I can save yours. Let me know-you shan't suffer for me, if I can help it. Make any use of this letter which you please. Yours ever,

BYRox. .

To bully You-yet shrink from battling Me,

Is baseness. Nothing baser stains “ The Times.
While Jeffrey in each catalogue I see,

While no one talks of priestly Playfair's crimes,
While Drummond, at Marseilles, blasphemes with glee,

Why all this row about my harmless rhymes?
Depend on't, Piso, 'tis some private pique
'Mong those that cram your Quarterly with Greek.
If this goes on, I wish you'd plainly tell 'em,

'Twere quite a treat to me to be indicted ;
Is it less sin to write such books than sell 'em ?

There's muscle !—I'm resolved I'll see you righted.
In me, great Sharpe, in me converte telum !

Come, Doctor Sewell, shew you have been knighted !
- On my account you never shall be dunn'd,

The copyright, in part, I will refund.
You may tell all who come into your shop,

You and your Bull-dog both remonstrated;
My Jackall did the same, you hints may drop,

(All which, perhaps, you have already said.)
Just speak the word, I'll fly to be your prop,

They shall not touch a hair, man, in your head.
You're free to print this letter; you're a fool
If you don't send it first to the John Bull.

EDITOR. Come, this is a good letter. If I had been Murray I would not have thought of the prose. I'll be hanged if I would.

ODOHERTY.
Is there any thing new in the literary world here?

Not much that I hear of. There's Colonel Stewart's History of the Highland Regiments, one of the most entertaining books that have been published this long time. You're a soldier, you must review it for me in my next Number.

ÉDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

I think I'll tip you a series of articles on the history of the Irish regiments. I'm sure I know as many queer stories about them as any Colonel of them all. Is the book well written?

EDITOR. Plainly, but sensibly, and elegantly too, I think. Not much of the flash that's in vogue, but a great deal of feeling and truth. Some of the anecdotes are quite beautiful, and the Colonel's view of the Highland character is admis rably drawn.

ODOHERTY.
I'm glad to hear it. Few officers write well except Julius Cæsar, the Heary
Horseman, and myself.

You forget General Burgoyne.
Aye, true enough. The General was a sweet fellow.

So are you all. Have you done nothing to your Campaigns? I'm sure they would sell better than Southey's.

That's no great matter perhaps. I don't think the Laureate has much of a military eye.

EDITOR. How does the John Bull get on?

Famously they say. I'm told they divided L.6000 at the end of the first year. I intend contributing myself if you do not pay me better.

ODOHERTY.

EDITOR.

ODOHERTY.

ODOHERTY.

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