· By honour feated in her breast She thinks that Bature ne'er defign'd For Stella never learn'd the art At proper times to scream and start; Her hearers are amaz'd from whence Say, Stella, was Prometheus blind, How would ingratitude delight, I blefs the hand from whence they came, Beft pattern of true friends! beware: You pay too dearly for your care, If, while your tendernefs fecures My life, it must endanger your's; For fuch a fool was never found, Who pull'd a palace to the ground, Only to have the ruins made Materials for a houfe decay'd. AN ELEGY KNOW all men by thefe prefents, Death the tamer, He walk'd the streets, and wore a threadbare cloak; Where'er he went, he never faw his betters; Lords, nights, and fquires, were all his humble And under hand and feal the Irish nation [debtors; Were forc'd to own to him their obligation. He that could once have half a kingdom bought, In half a minute is not worth a groat. His coffers from the coffin could not save, Nor all his intereft keep him from the grave. A golden monument would not be right, Because we wish the earth upon him light. Oh London tavern! thou haft loft a friend, Though in thy walls he ne'er did farthing spend: He touch'd the pence, when others touch'd the pot; The hand that fign'd the mortgage paid the fhot. Old as he was, no vulgar known disease On him could ever boast a power to seize; 66 + But, as he weigh'd his gold, grim Death in fpight 66 "Caft in his dart, which made three moidores light; "And, as he faw his darling money fail, "Blew his laft breath, to fink the lighter fcale."He who fo long was current, 'twould be ftrange If he should now be cry'd down fince his change. The fexton fhall green fods on thee bestow; Alas, the fexton is thy banker now! A difmal banker must that banker be, Who gives no bills but of mortality. EPITAPH ON A MISER. BENEATH this verdant hillock lies TO MRS. HOUGHTON OF BORMOUNT, Upon praising her Hufband to Dr. Swift, You always are making a god of your spouse; But this neither reafon nor confcience allows : * A tavern in Dublin, where Demar kept his office, †Thefe four lines were zeritten by Stella. APOLLO TO THE DEAN, 1720. RIGHT trufty, and fo forth-we let you to know, Lock up from my fight in cellars and cupboards. . Dean Sterne was diffinguifbed for his hofpitality. This every pretender to rhyme will admit, Without troubling his head about judgment or wit. Thefe gentlemen ufe me with kindness and freedom; ['em : And as for their works, when I please I may read They lie open on purpofe on counters and stails; And the titles I view, when I fhine on the walls. But a comrade of yours, that traitor Delany, Whom I for your fake love better than any, And, of my mere motion and Special good grace, Intended in time to fucceed in your place, On Tuesday the tenth feditiously came With a certain falfe traitrefs, one Stella by name, To the deanry houfe, and on the north glafs, Where, for fear of the cold, I never can pass, Then and there, vi et armis, with a certain utenfil, Of value five fhillings, in English a pencil, Did malicioufly, falfely, and traiteroufly write, Whilft Stella aforefaid ftood by with a light. My fifter had lately depos'd upon oath, That the ftopt in her courfe to look at them both: That Stella was helping, abetting, and aiding: And still as he writ, flood fmiling and reading: That her eyes were as bright as myself at noonday, [with gray; But her graceful black locks were all mingled And by the defcription I certainly know, "Tis the nymph that I courted fome ten years ago; Whom when I with the best of my talents endued On her promife of yielding, fhe acted the prude: That fome verses were writ with felonious intent, Direct to the north, where I never yet went : That the letters appeared revers'd through the pane, Jagain; But in Stella's bright eyes they were plac'd right Wherein the diftinctly could read every line, And prefently guefs that the fancy was mine. She can fwear to the perfon whom oft fhe has feen At night between Cavan Street and College Green. Now you fee why his verfes fo feldom are shown; The reafon is plain, they are none of his own: And obferve while you live, that no man is fhy To difcover the goods he came honestly by. If I light on a thought, he will certainly steal it, And, when he has got it, find ways to conceal it: Of all the fine things he keeps in the dark, There's fcarce one in ten but what has my mark; And let them be seen by the world if he dare, I'll make it appear that they're all ftolen ware. But as for the poem he writ on your fash, I think I have now got him under my lash; My fifter tranfcrib'd it laft night to his forrow, And the public fhall fee't, if I live till to-morrow. Through the zodiac around, it fhall quickly be fpread In all parts of the globe where your language is read.. And, from my own stock provided with topics, own; And you, like a booby, the bubble can swallow : So a thief fteals my horfe, and has him well drefs'd. ance, We Phoebus think fit to proceed to his fentence. NEWS FROM PARNASSUS, BY DR. DELANY. "That, to make you a laureat, I gave the first 66 "Infpiring the Britons t' appprove of my choice. "I'll tell you the reafon for which I refuse you : "Love's goddefs has oft to her parents complain'd "Of my favouring a bard who her empire difdain'd; "That, at my inftigation, a poem you writ, Which to beauty and youth preferr'd judgment and wit; And therefore they prudently chose to discard Then a bard who had been a fuccefsful tranf- Says Apollo, "You mention the leaft of your merit; 66 By your works it appears you have much of "I efteem you fo well, that to tell you the truth, Another, low bending, Apollo thus greets, Ce And therefore 'tis juft I distinguish his merit; PARNASSUS, February the twenty-feventh, pofe; Till at length he determin'd that every bard "Since the foul of great Milton was given to me, « And given in return neither reafon nor rhyme." explore, (6 The convention was fummon'd in favour of Swift. THE RUN UPON THE BANKERS, 1720. THE bold encroachers on the deep Gain by degrees huge tracts of land, Are faid to reprefent, the feas; Money, the life-blood of the nation, Corrupts and ftagnates in the veins, Unless a proper circulation Its motion and its heat maintains. Beraufe 'tis lordly not to pay, Quakers and aldermen in state The birds are met to ftrip the jays. Riches, the wifeft monarch fings, "Make pinions for themselves to fly:" They fly like bats on parchment wings, And geele their filver plumes fupply. money left for fquandering heirs! Bills turn the lenders into debtors: No The wifh of Nero now is theirs, "That they had never known their letters." Conceive the works of midnight hags, Tormenting fools behind their backs: Thus bankers o'er their bills and bags Sits fqueezing images of wax. Conceive the whole enchantment broke; With power no more than other folk, So powerful are a banker's bills, Where creditors demand their due; They break up counters, doors, and tills, And leave the empty chefts in view. Thus when an earthquake lets in light He hides within his darkeft cell. As when a conjuror takes a leafe From Satan for a term of years, The tenant's in a difmal cafe, Whene'er the bloody bond oppears. ▲ bated banker thus defponds, From his own hand forcfees his fall; They have his foul, who have his bonds; "Tis like the writing on the wall. How will the catiff wretch be fear'd, And all his grand account to make! Few bankers will to heaven be mounters; Conceal and cover us, ye counters!" 46 Weigh'd in the balance, and found light!" DESCRIPTION OF AN IRISH FEAST, Tranflated almoft literally out of the original Irish, His revels to keep, we fup and we dine our cup. O there is the fport! we rife with the light Come, harper, ftrike up; but, firft, by your favour, The floor is all wet with leaps and with jumps, While the water and sweat splish-splash in their pumps. Bless you late and carly, Laughlin O' Enagin! For people to fight in the midst of their beer! AN EXCELLENT NEW SONG, ON A SEDITIOUS PAMPHLET ¶, 1720. 66 To the ture of Packington's Pourd.” BROCADOS and damasks, and tabbies, and gauzes, Our true Irish hearts from old England to wean; A wooden veffel. An Irifs oath. Daggers, or foert fwords. Propofuls for the univerful use of Iris manufce tures, for which Watersth. printer was jeverely pra 1720. OROURK's noble fare will ne'er be forgot, + Handkerchief. § Irish for a woman. We'll buy Englifa filks for our wives and our daughters, In fpite of his deanfhip and journeyman Waters. In England the dead in woollen are clad, The dean and his printer then let us cry fy on; To be cloth'd like a carcafe, would make a Teague Since a living dog better is than a dead lion. [mad, Our wives they grow fullen At wearing of woollen, And all we paor fhop-keepers muft our horns pull in. [daughters, Then we'll buy English filks for our wives and our In spite of his deanfhip and journeyman Waters. Whoever our trading with England would hinder, To inflame both the nations do plainly confpire; Because Irish linen will foon turn to tinder, And wool it is greafy, and quickly takes fire. Therefore I affure you, Our noble grand jury, When they faw the dean's book, they were in a great fury. They would buy English filks for their wives and their daughters, In spite of his deanfhip and journeyman Waters. This wicked rogue Waters, who always is finning, And before corum nobus so oft has been call'd, Henceforward fhall print neither pamphlets nor linen, [mawl'd: And, if fwearing can do't, shall be swingingly And as for the dean, You know whom I mean, If the printer will 'peach him, he'll scarce come off clean. [daughters, Then we'll buy English filks for our wives and our In spite of his deanship and journeyman Waters. But by degrees, when mounted high, Her spots are gone, her vifage clears. "Twixt earthly females and the moon All parallels exactly run: Alas, the nymph would be undone ! All reeking in a cloudy fteam, Crack'd lips, foul teeth, and gummy eyes, Poor Strephon! how would he blafpheme! Three colours, black, and red, and white, So graceful in their proper place, Remove them to a different fcite, They form a frightful hideous face: For instance, when the lily fkips Into the precincts of the role, And takes poffeffion of the lips, Leaving the purple to the nofe: So Celia went entire to bed, All her complexion fafe and found; But, when the rofe, white, black, and red, Though still in fight, had chang'd their ground. The black, which would not be confin'd, And mingles in her muddy cheeks. By help of pencil, paint and brush, Each colour to its place and use, And teach her cheeks again to blush. As other painters oft' adore The workmanship of their own hands. Thus, after four important hours, Celia's the wonder of her fex: Say, which among the heavenly powers Could caufe fuch marvellous effects? Venus, indulgent to her kind, # Gave women all their hearts could wish, When first she taught them where to find White lead and Lufitanian dish. Love with white-lead cements his wings: White-lead was fent us to repair Two brightest, brittleft, earthly things, A lady's face, and China-ware. She ventures now to lift the fash: Take pattern by your fifler ftar: Delude at once and blefs our fight; When you are feen, be feen from far, And chiefly choose to fhine by night. But art no longer can prevail, When the materials all are gone; The beft mechanic hand muft fail, Where nothing's left to work upon Matter, as wife logicians fay, Cannot without a form fubfift; And form, fay I, as well as they, Muft fail, if matter brings no grift. And this is fair Diana's cafe; For all aftrologers maintain, Each night a bit drops off her face, When mortals fay fhe's in her ware: While Partridge wifely fhows the cause Efficient of the moon's decay, That Cancer with his poifonous claws Attacks her in the milky way: |