34 At length I spy a light afar, An old monk's flickering taper ; And knock my head against a bar 35 Bound by his strict vow not to talk, To where a dim light shines. 36 Once more I hear the solemn strain I stumble on a door, and strain An entrance then and there. 37 At last, to end my story queer, A man came to my aid, And took me where I well might hear, But could see nothing very clear, Nor tell a monk from maid. 38 For a whole hour the dismal tones Monotonously solemn, Like the wind's solitary moans, I heard behind a column. 39 Then, growing desperate, once more Losing my bearings o'er and o'er ; But "all's well that ends well." 40 My bed I gained. The monks' dull drawl Acted like soporific ; Soundly I slept till the bell's call To chapel once more summoned all, 41 I dressed, and bought a good supply Its pleasant inward ripple. 42 In the nuns' house 'twas the hard law No husband there might rest, Nor touch provisions with his paw, Still less upon them use his jaw To cause them to digest! 43 Nevertheless, this rule to break, My dame used coaxing wile; By means of harmless guile. 44 'Twas managed thus: while none could spy I quietly was smuggled Into a sweet nun's cell close by, [She was not there, unluckily !] And so the monks were juggled. 45 Thither the nuns some coffee bore My inward man to nourish, While one kept watch outside the door; The generous creatures I adore! Long may they live and flourish! 46 And now at last my tale is told, For homeward we then turned, For BRUNO's sake and convent old, 47 For though sweet woman they abuse, Whereby men are made better. 48 Then let us drink to Bruno's health In a mellifluous bumper Of his own brew! his convent's wealth, Whose godly monks do`good by stealth; So give the board a thumper! The Magic Mushroom. (A Fairy Tale founded on fact.) I I WILL a wondrous story tell To all who wish to know, Of something that myself befell While wintering at Pau. 2 Now Pau's a town in Southern France, Close to the Pyrenees, Where English people go to dance 3 But let me caution each male friend, Young, middle-aged, and old, Who thither may propose to wend, 'Gainst perils manifold. |