Shear Nonsense way dictating lettersa better way of writing them. me ?" Ten Times Quicker Than An Accident of Birth. his famous Siamese twins they were, as is well remembered, a wonderful sensation. to the who was much interested. The young woman asked where the twins were born. Mr. BarSaves its costeach num told them that they were born in Siam. month. OneClerk on “And are they brothers?” asked the clerical a Rand equals four gentleman. REG.U.S. PAT. OFF.. on old card index. "Oh, yes,” said the world's greatest press Simply a touch agent. and the name wanted "Well, well !” said the visitor. “Think of flashes before your eye. that, Mary! How good and kind of a graNo opening of drawers-no cious Providence to allow them to be brothers; TRADEMARK card fumbling-no misplac and not to have linked a pair of strangers toHolds 100 to 1,000,000 cards. ed cards — no bending of 200 visible at a glance. back —no eye-straining as gether for life !" with the old card index. New Cards inserted or old ones removed without disturbing arrangement. Why She Smiled. In rotary, stationary, book form or wall bracket styles. The Senator and the Major, says Harper's Every Business-Large or Small-Needs It Don't blame your stenographer beMonthly, were walking up the Avenue. The Used by National Shawmut Bank, Bell Telephone Co., Stand cause she writes "border” when you said ard Oil Cos, and others, for listing or indexing prices, addresses Senator was more than middle-aged and con "order.” It is the fault of the complior correspondence. siderably more than fat, and, dearly as the So simple it's equally adapted to the small business, too. cated and artificial system which takes Will you accept free a book telling how to save time and Major loved him, he also loved his joke. money? Write-it's yours by return mail. The Senator turned with a pleased expres the time of two people to dictate letters. THE RAND CO., Dept. C. J., North Tonawanda, N.Y. sion on his benign countenance and said, Its very complexity increases the chance 60 Union Square, New York City 200 Rosenbloom Bldg., Syracuse, N.Y. 1229 Munsey Bldg., Baltimore, Md. 324 White Bldg., Buffalo, N.Y. "Major, did you see that pretty girl smile at for making mistakes. 108 W. Monroe St., Chicago 306 Fourth St., St. Louis, Mo Don't blame your stenographer be642 Liberty Ave., Pittsburgh, PA 605-18t East, Calgary, Alberta, Can. 234 Congress St., Boston Clarke & Courts Bldg., Galveston, Tei. “Oh, that's nothing,” replied his friend. cause she cannot have your letters ready 82 Clay St., San Francisco, Cal. 707 Sprague Ave., Spokane, Wash. 633-639 Euclid Ave., Cleveland 418 Central Bldg., Rochester, N.Y. "The first time I saw you I laughed out loud !” on time. She has to spend most of the day “getting ready” to write them-takTact. ing notes, or sitting idle at your desk, “Oh, thank you !” exclaimed an elderly while you are interrupted by 'phone or for telephone convenience woman, as recorded in the London Tit-Bits, caller. and permanent desk order to a laborer who surrendered his seat in a Dictate to the Dictaphone and simplify crowded car. “Thank you very much !" your correspondence problem. No waitThe Equipoise Telephone Arm “That's orl right, mum,' was the rejoinder. ing, no annoying interruptions, no quesplaces your telephone always As the woman sat down the chivalrous tions to disturb your train of thought. within your reach, and keeps it laborer added : always out of your way. It is The whole day for your stenographer to “Wot I ses is, a man never ort to let a the impossibility of keeping the instrument out of your way woman stand. Some men never gets up un typewrite your letters. that keeps your desk in less she's young and pretty ; but, you see, mum, Ask for a demonstration on your own disorder. it don't make no difference to me.”. work. Reach for your telephone and call You only have to spend $5 up the Dictaphone. If you don't find once; and if you think the Equipoise Arm is not worth every cent of the investment, your money back willingly. Two Minutes Intermission. that name in the book, write to National Office Appliance Co. This story is told by Everybody's of an 705 State Street CAMDEN, N. J. absent-minded professor at Drew Theological (Columbia Graphophone Company) WOULD you like to own a good paying mall order Seminary. One evening while studying he had business! We have a line that gets repeat orders all the need of a bookmark. Seeing nothing else (Sole Distributors) time; you can start in spare time; invest a dollar or two handy, he used his wife's scissors, which lay Suite 1706, Woolworth Bldg., New York a week and soon own a nice business of your own. Write on the sewing-table. A few minutes later Stores in the principal cities- dealers everywhere for particulars. “Your Day's Work”-a book we should like to send you NADI00, 1682 Belmont Avenue, Chicago, Ill. the wife wanted the scissors, but a diligent Official Dictating Machine search failed to reveal them. of the Panama-Pacific International Exposition The next day the professor appeared before his class and opened his book. There lay Costs little, no plumbing, little water. the lost scissors. He picked them up and, Weight 15 pounds, folds into small roll. MADE TO MEASURE Full length baths, far bettor than tin tube. Lasts holding them above his head, shouted: SHIRTS FOR MEN for years. Write for special agents offer and desoription. Robinson Rath Cabinet Co.. 423 Factories Blle., Toledo, 0. “Here they are, dear!” I guarantee to fit you or refund your money. You choose from the Do you want a free round-trip ticket to He Knew. Season's newest designs comprising 200 of the the Panama-Pacific Exposition and cash for handsomest weaves and expenses? You may have both in payment In the Baltimore American appears this patterns. Learn what real shirt for spare time work this summer. Full par- pathetic story: comfort is ticulars upon request. Parkwood Bureau, “Say, boy, somebody told me I would find Just the right arm and Toth floor, 134 W. 29th St., New York. —Adv. a spanking team in this neighborhood. Do body length, ampleches room and correct nec! you know where they are?”. size. I take all the risks. "In our house, mister. They're pa and ma.” Send for free package of samples and self meas uring chart. I prepay There Was a Pause. charges to all points in the United States and wil refund the money if the According to the Atlanta Georgian. Judge goodsarenotsatisfactory No agents. 0. G. CLEMINSHAW the New Brunswick legislature, representing 165 River St., Troy, N.Y. CORRECT ENGRAVING the county of Westmoreland, was once delivand FINE STATIONERY The making of Wedding and Social Invitations, Visit If PEDAPADS fail to cure ing Cards,and Stamped Paper is our special work, done in our own shop. Samples and prices upon request. Mr. Blair. Callous, Bunion or tenLYCETT, Society Stationer "Oh, that my constituents in Westmoreland der, aching Feet in ten days we refund the money. Na 317 N. Charles Street Baltimore, Md. cutting, no bother whatever; just PEDAPADS. 50 cents (Continued on page 75.) postpaid. THE PEDAPAD CO., 2A Park Square, Boston, Mass. TAE DICTAPAONE REGISTERED Folding BATH TUB CUSTOM MADE 72 THE WESTERN ISLANDS A FO'C'S'LE TALE (Continued froin page 53.) Paralyze him, strike him cold. That's what a kiss of yours'd do.” "You ought to a been a parson,” said Joe, “that's what you'd ought. There's many would a paid you for talk like that. But for all your fine talk, and for all your dandy language, you'll not come the old soldier over me. No, nor ten of you. You talk of kissing, when there's a handsome young man, the likes of me, around? Neither you nor ten of you. To hear you talk one'd think you was a Emperor or a Admiral. One would think you 'was a Bishop or a King. One might mistake you for a General or a Member of Parliament. You might. Straight, you might. A General or a Bishop or a King. And what are you? What are you? I ask you plain. What are you?—I'll tell you what you are. "You're him as hired himself out as a scarecrow, acos no one'd take you as a fo'c's'le hand. You' him as give the colic to a weather-cock. You're him as turned old Mother Bomby's beer. You're him as drowned the duck and stole the monkey. You're him as got the medal give him for having a face that made the bull tame. You're—” "Now don't you cast no more to me." said Jerry. "For I won't take no lip from a twelve-a-shilling, cent-a-corner, the likes of you are. You're the clippings of old junk, what the Dagoes smokes in cigarets. A swab, and a washdeck-broom, and the half of a pint of paint 'd make a handsomer figer of a man than what you are. I've seen whisk, what they grooms a mule with, as had a sweeter face than you got. So stand aside, before you're put aside. I'm the king of this here island. You can go chase yourself for another. Stand clear, I say, or I'll give you a jog'll make your bells ring.” a coir N OW, while they were argufying, young Jim, the young apprentice feller, he creeps up to the queen upon the throne. She was beautiful, she was, and she shone in the sun, and she looked straight ahead of her like a waxwork in a show. And in her hand she had a sack full of jewels, and at her feet she had a sack full of gold, and by her side was an empty throne ready for the king she married. But round her right hand there was a red snake, and round her left hand there was a blue snake, and the snakes hissed and twisted and they showed their teeth full of poison. So Jim looked at the snakes, and he hit them a welt, right and left, and he kissed the lady. And immediately all the bells and the birds of the world burst out a-ringing and a-singing. The lady awoke from her sleep, and Jim's old clothes were changed to cloth of gold. And there he was, a king, on the throne beside the lady. But the red snake turned to a big red devil who took a hold of Joe, and the blue snake turned to a big blue devil, who took a hold of Jerry. And "Come you here, you brawling pugs," they said. "come and shovel sand." And Joe and Jerry took the spades that were given to them, And Dig now," said the devils. “Heave round. Let's see you dig. Dig, you scarecrows. And tell us when you've dug to London." Short-Story Writing A Course of forty lessons in the history, form, structure, and writing of the Short-Story taught by Dr. J. Berg Esenwein, Editor ot Lippincott's Magazine. One student writes: “I know that you will be pleased when I tell you that I have just received a check for $125 from 'Everybody's' for a humorous story. They ask for more. I am feeling very happy, and very grateful to Dr. Esen. wein. Also courses in Photoplay Writing, Ver. sification and Poetics, Journalism. In all, over One Hundred Courses, under protesDr. Esenwein sors in Harvard, Brown, Cornell, and other leading colleges. 250-Page Catalog Free. Please Address The Home Correspondence School Dept. 266, Springfield, Mass. To their Investing Public What the Bond Buyer Has a Right to Expect The articles appearing in this department are written by an expert in financial matters. Their aim will be to give conservative, reliable and instructive information. The information bureau conducted in this department is for the benefit of our subscribers. We shall be pleased to answer to the best of our ability any inquiries relative to investments. Write us. In Addition to Reasonable Interest Return Owners of Non-Dividend Paying Stocks are invited to send for a special letter we have just prepared which contains information and suggestions of value for those owning securities the income returns from which have ceased. Send for this special letter No. EF-90 A. B. Leach & Co. Investment Securities 149 Broadway, New York 105 So. La Salle St., Chicago THE INVESTORS' PREDICA MENT. Much has been written in these columns about security of principal. It has been the aim of the writer to impress his readers with the necessity of looking first to the absolute safety of the amount invested, and then to an adequate income yield. During the past month or two many facts have been developed by the various investigations of railroad methods of finance which have shaken the confidence of the public in what were heretofore regarded as some of our foremost railway properties. Whether these revelations as to high finance can be eventually substantiated, or whether the facts as presented to the public have been grossly magnified by the investigators for the sake of political aggran 1. The assurance of ample security behind his bonds through recommendation by a reputable investment banker. 2. A comprehensive and accurate statement of the physical and financial condition of the property, based upon the inves. tigations of experts. 3. Regular and prompt interest payments at stipulated rates during the life of the bonds. 4. The return of the full face value of the bonds at maturity. 5. A reasonable market in accordance with existing market conditions. 6. A copy of the report of the latest ap praisal of the property upon request. 7. Assurance of a conservative ratio of bonded indebtedness to value of pro perties mortgaged. 8. Assurance of sufficiency and legality of franchise and mortgage provisions, through competent legal opinion. 9 A sufficient margin of salety in earnings. Send for our Circular C 15, entitled, “How to Select a Good Bond." This circular core ers in greater detail many of the points mentioned above. DOLLARS OUT OF ONE DOWN J. I. Case Threshing Machine Co. First Mortgage 6's MORTGAGE SECURITIES @. P.M. SAUNDERS, PRESIDENT - LEVERING MOORE, AOTIVE VICE PRES. be determined in the future as the actual pairment of this credit may have a far- reaching effect on some of the securities 'THIS PICTURE BOOKLET of the properties now under fire. When blood has once been tasted it gives you the vital facts about investments in Municipal, Timberland and GUARANTEED is only animal nature to thirst for more, Real Estate Bonds in $100 and $500 pieces for and since public sentiment is, on the cash or on installments. whole, against corporations and trusts, Money compounding at 6% makes two dollars it is evident that the successful prose- cution of one railway corporation by more suits of a similar nature against CAPITAL PAID IN $ 600,000. other corporations. WHITNEY-CENTRAL BLDG. NEW ORLEANS. Should these suits be successfully prosecuted, and our principal railway is then of vital EXAMINING 43,337 ESTATES systems disintegrated, it importance for the bondholder to deter mine his precise situation in reference to the securities he holds. If the holder of a bond has taken the 6% Farm Mortgages WERE RIGHT precaution to assure himself as to the intrinsic worth of his holdings, and has ON THE GROUND on productive Northwest farm lands. become convinced that his bond is a iar with all details. We have operated mortgage close to the rails of one of for thirty years without a loss to a client. our large railway systems which has been showing adequate earnings, then N. D. disturbing influences which are threat- railway systems at the present time. During periods of prosperity, the pubshould write for new some of the banking “Lists of Needed In institutions become carried away with ventions,” Patent Buyers and “How to Get Your Patent and Your Money.'' Advice FREE. RANDOLPH & the increased earnings of our railway co., Patent Attorneys, Dept. 75, Washington, D. &. properties, and it is not difficult for some of these banking institutions to A thoroughly sound investment netting 6%. Business established 72 years ago; uniformly successful record; assets nearly 3 to 1; net earnings nearly 3 to 1; part of security is farmers' notes which alone would liquidate the entire bond issue. revealed the fact that 41,329 left less than "We're Right on the Ground an famil Ask for Circular T Write for Free Booklet K and currentlist. 6% Peabody, Houghteling & Co. (Established 1865) MEN OF IDEAS Diversified 6% July Investments was The most conservative investors limit their purchases to first mortgage bonds, and increase the soundness of their holdings by diversifying theirinvestments, placing theirfunds in several different issues. In response to this general demand we have selected from our July Investment List a few well-diversifie 6% bond issues, directly secured by first mortgages on the following: Store and office building on centrally located Chicago corner, valued at more than twice the bonds. New downtown Minneapolis store and office building, owned by a corporation with net assets nearly three times the bond issue. New buildings occupied by the largest department store in Pittsburgh, Pa., founded years ago. New downtown Kansas City office building, costing more than twice the total amount of bonds. These bonds are issued in denominations of $100, $500. and $1,000, and will come dae and be paid in serial installments in two to ten years, giving investors a choice of maturities. The fact that no investor has ever suffered loss of either principal or interest on any security purchased of us since this House was founded in 1882 is a record which we coramend to the attention of investors, and which we believe is an ample basis for confidence. Call or write for Circular No. 579-G are float securities which show adequate have never sold below 105 and the fives urities of this character, however, an issue of general lien five per cent. The Conservative Bond House must since the receivership, and are to-day not be confused with the International selling close to this figure. Banking House. This only goes to illustrate that if the The former purchases bond issues for investor has been judicious enough to its own account, after a careful and ascertain that his principal is adequately thorough investigation as to safety of secured through periods of prosperity principal and interest. as well as depression, he need not suffer No stone is left unturned in making a even though the company pass into the complete study of the property from hands of a receiver. every standpoint of intrinsic worth, and The railroads are in a critical condi. when the securities are finally offered to tion to-day. Some are now under inthe investors they can rest assured that vestigation, others are in line to be if the offering is made by a responsible investigated later on. house, then their interests have been Whether innocent or guilty, an investi. safeguarded and the investment can be gation of this kind injures the credit of relied upon. a road. On the other hand, the International It is difficult for the railroads with Banker does not always take these good credit to borrow money at the same precautions for the protection of present time, except at abnormally high his clients. rates. If the road's credit is questioned He is often the fiscal agent for the it is even more difficult and the rates property whose securities he handles, correspondingly higher. and these securities generally If the railroads are obliged to pay a wholesaled and placed with foreign in- higher rate to procure money, they are stitutions to be distributed at a price to also compelled to provide a greater sum yield a high rate of income. from their earnings to pay the interest Of late a number of these issues have on the money borrowed. been unable to meet their interest pay This being the case, and with the railments, and it is apparent that quite a roads showing constantly decreasing few more will find themselves in the earnings, it makes the situation serious same predicament before long. and requires some radical remedy to The American railways to-day are in prevent disaster. a sad plight. It has been asserted that high-handed So many compulsory restrictions have methods have been used by the direct. been placed upon them that it has ors in dealing with the finances of one caused the cost of operation to increase of our railroads, which has plunged it in a greater ratio than the gross earn- into the sorry plight in which it now ings — then wages higher than finds itself. It is in times such as these that the existing business depression is merely We are also informed that the busiIn some cases receiverships have al- ness of the country is in reality in the ready taken place, in other instances midst of prosperity, and that those who they are imminent. do not grasp the real state of affairs are If an investment has the proper value simply in a state of mental mourning. behind it, it is not apt to be disturbed However, the truth is that nearly all in case of receivership and reorganiza- lines of business throughout the countion, whereas some of the junior securi- try are at low ebb. ties may not fare so well. The facts cannot be contraverted. Take for example the St. Louis & San I have talked to a great many men, Francisco Railroad Co. Receivers were representing diversified lines of business, appointed in May, 1913, owing to the and I have yet to find one who has not inability of the company to raise funds said that his business was badly affected to meet a note issue which was due and that they were reducing their force June 1 of that year. of employees. At the time of receivership the St. Gold continues to be exported from Louis & San Francisco had outstanding, this country to the other side. including subsidiary companies, bonds At the time this article is written $11,totaling in amount over three hundred 500,000 in gold has been engaged for million dollars. export this week. This is not a good The St. Louis & San Francisco Rail- omen of prosperity. way general mortgage fives due 1931 We have one bright spot to look forand the general mortgage sixes due ward to, however. The indications are 1931 were practically a first mortgage that we shall have the largest crops on on the property, and the total amount record. of bonds of these two issues, which, Let us hope that this will be the turnthough bearing a different rate of inter- ing point from a depressed state in the est, were secured by the same mortgage, business and financial world to an era of amounted to only $9,484,000 out of the prosperity free from any political influ$320,000,000 of securities. ence which may overshadow our natural These bonds were regarded as a per- resources. fectly safe, well-secured investment, and even since the receivership the sixes Edward D. Reeves. are CURRENT OPINION 75 uld hear me now?” exclaimed the opposition AIMS EASY Animosities. The Sacred Heart Review is not always as mn as the name implies. It gives us this: ASSENGER.—That last station was my destiion, sah. Why, sah, didn't you stop thar? CONDUCTOR.—We don't stop there any more. engineer's mad at the station agent. "Thank Heaven For the 2 Extra Savage Shots” I fechour wifemis theft balone she youy bene. day say that, and you will He Did Not Mind. key Ikey, tailor by trade, had just taken an insurance policy. A few hours later, London Tit-Bits relates, by a curious coin-1 ence, a fire broke out, which consumed his p and its contents. The insurance company ld find no ground on which to refuse payat, but the letter which accompanied their 10 ck concluded as follows: Shots We note that your policy was issued at Quick e on Friday, and that the fire did not take echo it from bottom of your heart ce until three o'clock the same day. Why She may use up five or six bullets, shooting through the door delay?" or window, and then turn unexpectedly to face another burglar, the pal, who has been inside all the time. Ten shots are better than eight when you are attacked by more than one burglarTaking Care of the Family. when you have to let go several shots out of the window to call the police when the burglars' hiding place is unknown, and you have to send bullets biffing and banging to his came from Everybody's and is about rout them out. prado, where the women vote as well as Get a 10-shot Savage. Otherwise you may some day find yourself with a pistol men : in your hand empty. n the fall of 1910 a man named Smith You can tell at a glance or touch if the Savage is loaded; also if cocked. No other running for sheriff against a man named automatic guards against the old excuse "didn't know it was loaded." You pull the trigger fast or slow-once for each shot. .32 and .380 caliber. es. One evening just before election Smith Send today for booklet by Sheridan--for 20 years head of New York City detectives e up to the barn-yard of an old farmer. -"What to Do If You Hear a Burglar." farmer was milking a cow and was hav A Brand New Savage Rifle! difficulty with a lusty calf that continually d to "butt in.” The candidate, to gain the This .22 Tubular Repeater has all the original Savage features—hammerless, trombone action, solid breech, solid top, side ejection, etc. Price, $12. Send for circular, or of the farmer, took the calf between his and held it until the milking was done. SAVAGE ARMS COMPANY, 467 SAVAGE AVENUE, UTICA, NEW YORK then introduced himself: "I am Mr. Smith, Republican candidate for sheriff of the for publication wled: "Wall, I reckon I do. se now, holding the baby.” verses or melodies. Experi. Let me tell you, by mail, how I cured myself, after 30 years ence unnecessary. We will revise, write music to your words, of misery and failure. Discovered a natural method which publish, advertise, and copyright in YOUR name. Our composanyone can use at home. Since then have won social and ing staff best. Instructive book “Successful Songwriting, business success. Send me your address, in confidence. Soft for the Cat. free. MARKS-GOLDSMITH CO., Dept. 14 Washington, D. C. WALTER MCDONNELL, Drawer F 709, Station F, Washington, D. c. THE NEW SAVAGE AUTOMATIC He's in the ST-STU-T-T-ERING OR STAMMERING SONG POEMS WANTED SOS Ramon Stained with Cabot's Creosote Stains e picked this up under Everybody's chest- Banks, great and small from one end of the country THE BOOK OF 100 HOUSES Sent Free to Anyone Who Intends to Build This book contains photographic views of over 100 houses of every variety and style of architecture (from the smallest camps and bungalows to the largest residences) that have been built in all parts of the country, under widely varying conditions of climate and surroundings and stained with Baker-Vawter Company Cabot's Shingle Stains EAKERS! We assist in preparing Lectures, Club Papers, ions, Essays, Debates, and give literary of all kinds. Expert service on your special ect, The Research Bureau, 326 Fifth Ave., N. Y. AKE STORY-WRITING TAUGHT BY Originators of the loose l.ear I.eigner and Il'orld's Stee! Filing Equupinent selling direct to user Sales Offices in All Principal Cities Eastern Office and Factory HOLYOKE, MASS. MSS. criticized, revised, and typed; also, sold tion, Dept. 41, Indianapolis, Ind. |